Good Riddance, Riley

So, the Miami Heat suck, and Pat Riley has decided to step down as coach. Is anybody surprised? Isn't this what he always does? Jumps into a coaching job when it looks like he can win a title without much effort, and jumps out when things go south. I can't stand this guy. Let me count the ways.

1. The Three-Peat trademark. Read this article for the full story, but basically, Riley trademarked the term "Three-Peat" (even though nobody really thinks he came up with it), and then had his lawyers go after a blogger who printed up "Three-Pete" T-shirts when the USC football team was going for 3 championships in a row ("Pete" for Coach Pete Carroll). I'm expecting a nasty phone call just for using the term in this paragraph.

2. Stealing the 1997 series from the Knicks. Now, this was right after he jumped ship from the Knicks to the Heat, costing the Heat a million dollars and their 1st round draft pick for tampering. Most Knicks fans believe that Riley ordered the Code Red (you're goddamn right I did!) that big P.J. Brown executed on little Charlie Ward in Game 5 of the 2nd round of the playoffs (when the Heat were down 3 games to 1), causing five Knicks players to be suspended for leaving the bench in Ward's defense. Because a team has to have at least 9 active players, Patrick Ewing, Allen Houston, and Ward were suspended for Game 6, and Larry Johnson and John Starks were suspended for Game 7. Of course, the Heat won the last 3 games of the series and advanced. This was much worse than what happened in the Suns/Spurs series last year, but nobody really talks about it anymore. The leftover animosity from all of these events culminated in the fight between former teammates Alonzo Mourning and Larry Johnson in the 1998 playoffs (you remember, the one where Jeff Van Gundy was ridiculously hanging on to Mourning's leg like a poodle in heat).

3. The Double Screwing of Stan Van Gundy. And this guy was supposedly his friend! First, when Shaq is just about to return from an injury and it looks like Pat can add another easy title to his resume, he forces Van Gundy out of his job, takes over himself, and takes all the credit for the championship. Then, when Stan later gets offered the Orlando job, Riley insists that Stan's contract with the Heat has not expired yet, and forces the Magic to give the Heat a draft pick in return for releasing SVG. Are you kidding me? With a friend like Pat, I'd rather just have enemies.

Riley's retirement couldn't have come early enough for me. Unfortunately, knowing Pat, he'll be back. I can imagine him sitting at home right now trying to figure out how to get rid of Phil Jackson or Doc Rivers just in time for the Finals. We haven't heard the end of this jerk - there are still a few people out there he hasn't screwed yet.