College Football- Help Wanted

With my partner Hambone at the hospital awaiting the little Hambone, I'm left to make the college football plays. If anyone who doesn't work for Big Brother feels like line-shopping, please feel free to do so and post your findings in the comments. I'm using the lines at the USA Today website and assuming -110, since that's all I can access I have here at Globex headquarters.

UAB (+26.5) -110 at South Carolina, 1.1 units to win 1 unit.

This one is all Hambone- he loved it early this week, even though he's Columbia born-and-bred. All I know is that South Carolina plays in the SEC, which according to annoying rednecks everywhere, is so good that their worst team could win every other NCAA conference even if they only got to put nine guys on the field. Personally, I'm a big fan of fading the opinions of loudmouth rednecks.

And while I'm on the topic: please, please stop wearing your cheap sunglasses on the brims of your baseball caps. You look like an idiot and a mindless conformist, and, more importantly, wearing either of the aforementioned items eliminates the need for the other.

OK, I'm done now.

Houston (+11) -110 at East Carolina, 2.2 units to win 2 units.

Check it out- I have a sixth sense. I can't access Wagerline, and haven't looked at the numbers for this week at all, but I predict that East Carolina, which lost to a terrible NC State team last week, is getting well over 60% of the action thanks to their extensive media exposure over the last month. Am I right? Anyway, we're not that impressed with ECU's "big-time" wins over (1) a rebuilding Virginia Tech team that was starting a QB so terrible that they had to un-redshirt a guy to replace him, and (2) a West Virginia team that, apparently, doesn't have a head coach. Houston keeps this one close.

Tennessee (+6.5) at Auburn, 1.1 units to win 1 unit.

Nobody loves poor Tennessee. Awww. I think it's the transitive property- they lost to UCLA, UCLA lost to BYU 59-0, ergo, Tennessee is terrible. But that sort of thinking never works in college football. Auburn's valiant effort against an LSU team that is not nearly as good as last year's national champions certainly has them getting some unwarranted love, too. We think the Vols put up a good fight, and Fulmer gets to stick around at least one more week.

Players pulling stunts like this certianly doesn't give me much confidence in Tennessee, though.

Michigan (+6) vs Wisconsin, 1.1 units to win 1 unit

It's "maligned national power" week at Against All Odds. We're not impressed with Wisconsin, and we think Michigan makes a stand this week and maybe even pulls the outright upset. I don't have much else to say about this game, so I'll note that The Big House and Camp Randall are the only two big time tradition-rich college football stadiums I've ever visited- I'm not counting various ACC and Ivy league stadiums, as they're either big time or tradition-rich, but never both. And between them, the Badgers win the "best stadium experience" contest in a walkover. Get it together, Ann Arbor. I recommend way more cussing in your chants, and way, way less tomahawk-chopping.